We are standing around the dead dire wolves in the forest, of which we fucking destroyed.
Hargle skins them we get [5 dire wolf pelts], they fetch a neat price.
Bartimeous, currently unknown to the party, rolls for a boner. He gets a morning wood, roughly half mast.
The party goes through the forest in the direction of the twink who burned everything down.
*perception roll - hargle gets nat20*
Hargle smells campfire smoke and hears some music, we assume it might be where Enima is hiding.
The party sees Bartemeous and introduce themselves. They do it horribly.
They meander along,
two goblins come up and hargle pisses his pants a little [12ml]
[ BEGIN COMBAT ]
Hargle runs up, withers and spores a gobbo and a hobgobbo, spores one goblin to death, and reaches into a bag to get a slime
The hobgobbo swings at the slime, it seems to cleave apart but them comes together again.
Bardemeous tells a funny joke, pointing at the dead goblin turned into mushrooms, “Check plz”, the hobgoblin laughs so hard he pulls every muscle in his body.
Martyr inflicts wounds, but critically fails, so he just throttles the goblin by the fucking neck.
Heywood does a little spin, backflips, and elbow drops a goblins windpipe into dust. Heywood punches the gobbo
uhhh
hargle tells the boss gobbo to kill imself, the black pudding doesn't do shit,
bardemeous keeps heckling gobbos,
martyr soups a gobbo,
heywood runs up to the gobbo “ratshit”, and fails to punch it in the back of the head.
Hargle runs toward the gobbos that start to retreat. He vanishes into thin air, surprisingly, and then manifests next to one of the goblins. He tries to spore but the gobbo resists. He then turns to the other goblin, and tells him to kill himself. Complying, its body dissolves into dust.
Martyr runs toward a gobbo, brings his fist toward the ground, and the gobbo is smitten.
Bardemeous says “That gibba just got knocked tha fuck out!!”
[ END COMBAT ]
Bardemeous checks the gobbos trousers, gets 5 gold.
Heywood checks the foreskin of the gobbo, and finds cock.
Therer is a small bine theat iis boreiwn up one of the trees : serfsleaf, it helps with colds and weaker diseases. 3 servings of tea.
we find enym, he dies because gnosos,
[gain orb]
we go back to to town
[ BACK TO TOWN ]
bardy give 1 gold to guard, hargle give 2 gold
There are some cool bars, such as “The Old Mudhole”
We can't find the cranked hog, we are going to fucking die on these streets.
sleep
went to temple, heywood cured of old
went to library, martyr and barty are looking for information on Gnosos.
Silf, sister of Tyr, the “Crying Goddess” and unfortunate wife of Gnosos, was used as a method of binding Gnosos into the physical plane. Tyr had fought with Gnosos during a war between the gods.